When I was 9 I met my 14 year old half brother for the first time, he stayed at our house for the summer (I never seen him again after that ) and during that time he convinced me to give him s3xual favors and even attempted to rape me, he was also physically abusive towards me. At that time I had no idea what was right or wrong so I just went along with everything he told me to do and never questioned or told anyone. I forced my self to forget everything that happened but about a year ago something triggered those memories and I’ve been having dreams about him ever since. He’s starting to get back in contact with my mom and I’m afraid that one day he may come back to see her and I don’t know what to do. my family members talk so highly of him and are so close to him I feel like they won’t believe me if I ever wanted to tell someone what happened

My parents split up in August of 2018. I was so mad at him for everything he did to me and my family, including my mom. He chose hard drugs, and to cheat on my mom with her childhood bestfriend. I texted him once in a while, because I was 15 and I wanted to make sure my dad knew I didn’t hate him. Then I cut off contact with him after seeing him again in December and hugging him for the last time. I was never able to see him. In March 2021, (my room was right beside the front door) I took a nap at 6pm and woke up at 8pm, to the front door being opened and my mom talking at the door, my grandma was crying and my siblings were upstairs. I was so confused and my grandma comforted me while crying, I asked her if my dad was dead. She said “yes my girl.. he killed himself..” I was in shock at first and I let out the most blood curdling cry. I regret not talking to him. I believe that it’s my fault he’s dead, because I didn’t talk to him. I have the last message he sent to me, and I read it almost every day. I wish I could have done something to save him. Maybe I could have stopped him.

• August 5, 2023