So I'm 14 and there's this guy I like named Jackson, but I love him, I love him so much and I know it's early to feel like this ig, but he's so perfect, anyway I wrote a song about him and performed it in front of 100-150 people at new years 2021 dance. I had my friend tell him that the song was written about him. And after I sang the song and got off the stage a whole bunch of people were congratulating me. Then I find my friend and she says that Jackson wanted to talk to me. So we find him and the first thing he does is give me a $20 bill and says " I want your first album" Wich made me blush a lot. But then he proceeded to reject me. He said stuff like how he has been hurt and he was too broken to like anyone, he said there was a guy out there but it's not him. This broke me and I am still hurt over it and I have been rejected many times by other guys since this happened. But the worst part is that after he said all the crap about how he couldn't like anyone because he was too broken I saw him holding hands with a girl the very same night. I am now writing a song about him and I plan so give him a USB with my album on it and give it to him before I release it. I see him all the time at church, and I should mention that neither of us are allowed to date until we are 16. I still really love him and I wonder if I should try and be his friend again? Or find someone else to like. I just wanted someone to know how I felt before I die. I hope he eventually knows how much I care about him.

I been thinking real hard about even relaying these awful things about the person that I have admired the most, the person I have respected and revered my whole life but that now, has completely backstabbed me in the worst way possible. A few years ago, a scandal broke in my political family involving my mother. As you can imagine, it nearly broke my marriage and tore my husband’s family apart. My sister in law found my father in law and my mom talking on social media. The worst part of it, when I was confronted, I was accused of knowing about the whole affair and made it looked like I was an accomplice to the whole ordeal. When I had absolutely no clue to such a disgusting mess. I don’t know what neither of them were trying to accomplish and now, I’m the black sheep of the family. No one talks to me. While my father in law is still loved and honored. My mother the home wrecker and I pay the sins of her ordeals. She never once has said I’m sorry. Never! In her head, I’m better off without that side of the family. But it’s not about that; why did she do this to me? Why my father in law? Among so many men? Why him! I guess I’m just looking for an explanation and I know I will never get it from her. Because she just cannot accept she did anything wrong. I wish I could get her version because as of now, I only know everyone else’s but her’s. I always thought I didn’t need to hear her side because it’s not my place to question her, but I have kids who now have to suffer for her sins as well. I don’t think it’s fair to them either. I guess the damage is done as well and the past is the past. I won’t get nothing accomplished but I just want an acknowledgment from her part that she messed up.

• August 12, 2023