So about a year ago I was in some gang stuff and I got a girlfriend and she didn't like it so the way I had to get out of it was I had to kidnap my Bestfriend and brutally torture him to a bloody pulp and if I didn't do it I wouldve been shot so when I was done torturing him I had to shoot him in the head and I have so much fucking guilt it hurts so bad I'm just glad I can get it off my chest

i’m tired. i used to be a straight A student all through middle school. i was a good kid. never argued, had lots of friends, was likable, nice, i loved my life. i’m now a freshman in high school, so i’m not that old. i’m scared to eat, i can’t trust anyone, i’m failing 4 classes, i don’t come out of my room, just lost my best friend, my ex who i still love despises every inch of me. it’s taking a toll on my mental health and i’m just tired of being here. tired of pretending i’m happy just so other people don’t worry about me. i don’t know what to do, how to react. my anxiety is over the roof, to where i can’t even get out of bed. i got diagnosed with being bipolar, which is hard. i just don’t know what to do. i’m trying but i’m so tired. i’m running out of options.

• August 2, 2023