One night when my mom went to work her bf came over to check on me and my brothers and it was summer time and we was awake playing the game when he came in my room @ 2 in the morning and said "get want $200 to spend with your friends?" I said yea thinking I just got $200 just like that w/o having to do anything then he said "come in my room" (which is basically my mom's room) I went in there and he locked the door and I didn't want to get in trouble so I didnt touch it all i did was sit on the bed then he told me to get undress so I did *again I didnt want to get in trouble* next thing I knew I was getting my licked over and over. And then he told me to suck his and I told him I can't cause ion know how to.. and he forced me to do it. Now he bribed me to not tell by giving me $200 every weekend so my mom doesn't find out.. but I still have to suck his and he still licks my . But I dont want to get in trouble so I go with it and don't tell anyone and this has been going on snice I was 8 in now 16.

I fell in love with a guy for 5 years of my life. No matter how much time we were away from each other I couldn’t forget him or move on from him. 2 years ago I started to date someone else and had stoped talking to the other guy who we will call Jacob. For so long I thought that I had stoped loving Jacob yet not once did he leave my mind. He was always in my heart and was such an important person. Many people ask why I didn’t just stay with him. The truth is that he never told me how he truly felt. He never spoke his mind to me. He was always quiet and refused to tell me how he felt about me. In a way I know he loved me too. I just don’t think he wanted to be an open person because he was never open with anyone at all. We weren’t meant to be and this past summer I left my relationship to try and be with Jacob but he was hurting me by staying silent and not telling me if he wanted to be with me. He said he did but he wasn’t open on his feelings and as much as I think he did love me I also think that he was never gonna fight for me or open up to me. I wish it was different. He was the only person I will ever have such a strong connection and bond with. After two months of trying to work something out with him again. It failed. I felt like he wanted the whole world but me. I love him I really do. I went back to the guy I was dating because I felt it was unfair to leave such a great guy for something that wasn’t gonna work out. However I truly love Jacob and yes I love my boyfriend too but Jacob will always be a piece of my life and soul. I don’t know how to let Jacob go. At nights I miss him a lot and I need to constantly remind myself that I need to let him go. I just wanna forget him and move in. I wish it was easy. I just wanna feel happiness and no longer pain from a love that was too good to be true.

• July 30, 2023