my biggest regret was letting you stay the night. no one believes what happened, but I’ve day you will get karma

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What are your deepest secrets that you would like to share before you d.i.e?

my biggest regret was letting you stay the night. no one believes what happened, but I’ve day you will get karma

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🙇‍♂️ Failure

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i want to die I guess to most people it looks like I’m a really happy person. I didn’t think I’d get through middle school I started becoming suicidal in the 6th grade and it got better the summer before I started high school but now it’s worse. Worse than before I dont know what I want in my life and I feel like there truly is not point to anything if we’re all going to die anyways no matter what and on some days that is the only thing that keeps me going that someday it’s all gonna end so I don’t have to do it myself. People think I’m super extroverted and I do talk to a lot of people but only so that it doesn’t make me feel alone and I play a lot of sports but only for the pain when we have to run or during games that adrenaline makes me so happy. I used to be the golden child of my family now I’m the black sheep nothing matters to me anymore I started vaping and failing school everything’s falling apart and I don’t care enough to try to fix it. I just want it all to end already

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I don’t really know how to say any of this but oh well… when I had just started middle school (September 5-6th), later that month the 25th me and my family of 8 got evicted, parents got divorced while family was broken up pretty much, my siblings and I were barely close, none of us talked to each other really except when we had nothing nice to say we still said it.. but now we are all REALLY broken up. Sister moved, brother idk tbh, 3 other sister are with my dad, and what if “Emma” doesn't know what to do when she needs help. She’s not even 10, she was pretty much born into homelessness and has never really had a place to call “home”, everyone of us had lost hope for anything. I feel like my mom is depressed, and I wish I could help her but idk how. And I’ve secretly always wanted to bring up a convo we’re she can talk about her feelings with me but her being an adult and me being a teenager “I won’t understand” it “your too young to know what it feels like”. And every one just expects so much out of anyone now that it’s like oh you HAVE to be happy or you HAVE to smile.. you can’t just take a breather or have time to yourself, your failing in life, your failing in school, your chores aren’t done. I know that probably didn’t make sense or end up going anywhere but I just wanna give a big ole FUCK YOU to the world.

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