I’ve been struggling with my mental health more than usual lately and it’s been incredibly hard. I’m in college full time and work part time on top of that, so juggling school, work, and my mental health has been taking a toll on me. Usually I could just ignore how I was feeling and get my homework over with but recently I’ve been getting into these moods where all I can do is just sit there, doing nothing. I can’t even force myself to do my homework or eat or anything. I still go to class bc school’s really important to me but it’s just been really hard. Living with my roommate doesn’t make it any easier bc I don’t wanna cry in front of her but I also have nowhere else to go, so I’m kind of just stuck. I haven’t had the motivation or energy to hang out with friends or even talk to them, and I hope that doesn’t hurt their feelings or give them the wrong impression. I’m usually such a happy person constantly smiling n all that. It’s just really hard rn. It’ll get better soon I’m sure but it just sucks to be in this place.

TW// self harm & suicide i’m known as the “perfect girl” with a “perfect life” by everyone. my parents are still together. there are literally no problems in my family, everyone gets along really well. we aren’t struggling with money. i have all A’s. i was accepted into one of the top private schools in my state. i’ve been on homecoming court and i’ve been elected for a position in the student council. my parents do everything they can to give me an amazing life. but for some reason i feel so sad. i don’t know why and i feel so selfish but i feel sad. i feel like everyone hates me and like they would be better off without me. everyone thinks i’m perfect and my friends even tell me that i’m “the only mentally stable person” that they know. i’m scared of telling anyone else this after it got out and got to my parents. but since this is anonymous i wanted to let it out. i self harm and i relapsed so many times. i attempted 3 times in the past 2 years. obviously it didn’t work and i don’t plan on doing it again for now but i have thoughts about it. it sucks. and i feel so hopeless and helpless even more since no one can see it. i know this is selfish but sometimes i wish people would try and understand and talk to me

• August 5, 2023