Idk how or when but at some point in time I wasn’t able to make out my feelings or personality. I think it might’ve been from be doing everything for my family and pretending to be fine happy and all when I was actually suicidal. Even to this day I have suicidal or self harming thoughts. If you were to ask me how I feel about stuff like emotionally and my mental health or ask me serious questions I would’ve be able to give an answer. It sucks bc I have no idea what emotional and mental state I am. I feel like I’m not even myself anymore bc I pretend to be happy yet I’m suicidal and can’t even cry. Yet I can’t get help bc my family leans on me and depends on me for everything. Sometimes I just wanna disappear.