I was molested and almost raped by my dad for 4 years. It started in 7th grade and went on til 11th. I told my mom and she wants to leave and call cops I'm 18 and I have younger siblings. My mom's job don't pay enough for our house and bills. I begged her not to call police or tell my siblings because I don't want them to have a childhood without a dad or living with struggle. I know he won't hurt them because we never leave them alone and also he has "reconnected" with God and God forgave him. He won't come near me but I have anxiety whenever I'm around older men. I was also diagnosed with social anxiety because of it. My mom doesn't know about that or my anxiety. She thinks I'm just shy. I want help but I'm scared of the consequences my family will face if I do.

TW// self harm & suicide i’m known as the “perfect girl” with a “perfect life” by everyone. my parents are still together. there are literally no problems in my family, everyone gets along really well. we aren’t struggling with money. i have all A’s. i was accepted into one of the top private schools in my state. i’ve been on homecoming court and i’ve been elected for a position in the student council. my parents do everything they can to give me an amazing life. but for some reason i feel so sad. i don’t know why and i feel so selfish but i feel sad. i feel like everyone hates me and like they would be better off without me. everyone thinks i’m perfect and my friends even tell me that i’m “the only mentally stable person” that they know. i’m scared of telling anyone else this after it got out and got to my parents. but since this is anonymous i wanted to let it out. i self harm and i relapsed so many times. i attempted 3 times in the past 2 years. obviously it didn’t work and i don’t plan on doing it again for now but i have thoughts about it. it sucks. and i feel so hopeless and helpless even more since no one can see it. i know this is selfish but sometimes i wish people would try and understand and talk to me

• August 5, 2023