I hate being a mother. I love my children with all my heart and they give me so much purpose, but I honestly wish I never had kids. I regret it and I feel guilty for feeling that way because they didn’t ask to be here but I was being young, dumb, and looking for love. I don’t want to be a full time mom plus the job I have won’t let me be one. They live with their dad, but it’s so bad because I don’t even want to go see them or get them sometimes. I’ll never hurt or abandon my children because I know what it feels like to not have a loving mom but I don’t know how to stop feeling like this. I’d like to know if any moms understand me.

TW// self harm & suicide i’m known as the “perfect girl” with a “perfect life” by everyone. my parents are still together. there are literally no problems in my family, everyone gets along really well. we aren’t struggling with money. i have all A’s. i was accepted into one of the top private schools in my state. i’ve been on homecoming court and i’ve been elected for a position in the student council. my parents do everything they can to give me an amazing life. but for some reason i feel so sad. i don’t know why and i feel so selfish but i feel sad. i feel like everyone hates me and like they would be better off without me. everyone thinks i’m perfect and my friends even tell me that i’m “the only mentally stable person” that they know. i’m scared of telling anyone else this after it got out and got to my parents. but since this is anonymous i wanted to let it out. i self harm and i relapsed so many times. i attempted 3 times in the past 2 years. obviously it didn’t work and i don’t plan on doing it again for now but i have thoughts about it. it sucks. and i feel so hopeless and helpless even more since no one can see it. i know this is selfish but sometimes i wish people would try and understand and talk to me

• August 5, 2023