Honestly, I feel like I'm in such a bad place right now. I just need to vent. I need to get my grades up. I need to be making more money. Everyone said "just get a new job" like it's so easy. I've applied to so many places and no reply. I feel like I just need a while to myself to get my life together. Not trying to say it's my friends faults but I need to stop going and hangin out with everyone and focus on myself. I need to lose weight to even look at myself. I'm only 16. This is too much for me. No one realizes I'm hurting inside. I don't show it because I'm the one everyone goes too. I've never been able to open up about my feelings. I'm too scared to tell anyone how I feel because I don't want pity. If I tell someone how I feel I want reassurance and help. No one gets that. No one's helping. I feel so lonely.

TW// self harm & suicide i’m known as the “perfect girl” with a “perfect life” by everyone. my parents are still together. there are literally no problems in my family, everyone gets along really well. we aren’t struggling with money. i have all A’s. i was accepted into one of the top private schools in my state. i’ve been on homecoming court and i’ve been elected for a position in the student council. my parents do everything they can to give me an amazing life. but for some reason i feel so sad. i don’t know why and i feel so selfish but i feel sad. i feel like everyone hates me and like they would be better off without me. everyone thinks i’m perfect and my friends even tell me that i’m “the only mentally stable person” that they know. i’m scared of telling anyone else this after it got out and got to my parents. but since this is anonymous i wanted to let it out. i self harm and i relapsed so many times. i attempted 3 times in the past 2 years. obviously it didn’t work and i don’t plan on doing it again for now but i have thoughts about it. it sucks. and i feel so hopeless and helpless even more since no one can see it. i know this is selfish but sometimes i wish people would try and understand and talk to me

• August 5, 2023