(sorry if this is long, also wanna clarify that me and “Eva” are poly and both talked about any other relationships we had.) Awhile ago I was dating this girl (let’s call her Eva), I had just gotten out of a toxic relationship though so i was kinda standoff-ish, though i really did love her. But she tried to make me feel comfortable and was really understanding. Her friend on the other hand… yeah f that guy (let’s call him Justin). I tried to make it clear I was uncomfortable about some jokes he made, but he didn’t listen. Anyways, i was also “dating” this guy… Jake? i’m bad at making up names. hes a terrible guy but i was going through sh!t and he gave me attention so i didn’t care and just took his side in things. you’ll see why that’s relevant later. flash forwards a few months later, Justin trys to flirt with me cause one of my friends said i liked him (i didn’t). I went along with it though cause he was the only good friend i had who “cared” about me. BUT my friend snaps me saying that he sent her a message basically saying i was hella desperate and that was why he was saying those things (i was literally sending memes before he said everything). THEN i got pissed at him and sent him a whole thing saying how hes a conceited desperate b!tch. he try’s to manipulate me into forgiving him then flips on me when it doesn’t work. ok quick pause to go back to Jake. Jake and i broke up and got back together, but when we got back together, he didn’t tell me that he was also dating Justin. so Justin try’s to say “my bf cheated on me with you so ur worse than me”. it wasn’t my fault but i can’t help feeling like it kinda was… anyways, Justin convinced Eva to block me since they were “bffs”. She sends me a whole essay saying how she always suspected i didn’t really like her and she hopes i enjoy my relationship with Jake (who i wasn’t dating anymore?). But She apologized the next day, but then we didnt talk afterwards. haven’t talked since but stuff came out that Justin really was a terrible guy. I still really love Eva. I just got news the other day that Eva tried to commit. I cant contact her though cause of Justin and the fact that this was awhile ago. idk what to do cause i wanna get back with her but I don’t think i can ever be forgiven for what happened. what do I do? was this my fault? did Justin actually do anything wrong? or was i just too on guard from my ex?
