HSR Stories

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July 30, 2023
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i want to die I guess to most people it looks like I’m a really happy person. I didn’t think I’d get through middle school I started becoming suicidal in the 6th grade and it got better the summer before I started high school but now it’s worse. Worse than before I dont know what I want in my life and I feel like there truly is not point to anything if we’re all going to die anyways no matter what and on some days that is the only thing that keeps me going that someday it’s all gonna end so I don’t have to do it myself. People think I’m super extroverted and I do talk to a lot of people but only so that it doesn’t make me feel alone and I play a lot of sports but only for the pain when we have to run or during games that adrenaline makes me so happy. I used to be the golden child of my family now I’m the black sheep nothing matters to me anymore I started vaping and failing school everything’s falling apart and I don’t care enough to try to fix it. I just want it all to end already

July 1, 2023

My girlfriend tried to kill herself by OD, and I felt nothing. No sadness, just. Nothing. I just went avout my night as usual, not caring

July 1, 2023

My biggest regret in life, gettingnwoth a girl who just broke up with her boyfriend, she asked me out though, after the first few dates we had sex, she initiated and she was my first, the next day she goes back to her ex, claiming she didn't want to hurt me, so here I am debating everything, she was my first, I was truly happy with her, she was happy, all I wanted was her to be happy, and now I feel like a tool used for a temporary relief and my first time ever is with someone who I feel used me cause she knew she was my first

June 30, 2023

Im depressed, I had a rough childhood, not as bad as most. I was mentally hurt a lot, and my parents would fight. It’s over though, it’s been almost a year since it ended, and now I’m in a new school and have a lot of good friends. I do miss all of my old friends, I haven’t seen any of them in years. They were the people I grew up with. From age 4 to 10. I was also outside almost all of the time. Till I moved, then I had nothing to get away from it for years. Like I said before it’s over though so I don’t know why I still feel like this.

June 30, 2023

I love my boyfriend. I just don't like being in a relationship. I have done a lot of things I'm not proud of. I'm afraid he gonna leave but I also want him to. I don't get what to do I'm constantly in a battle of what to do. We have a kid together too. But day in and day out I think about not wanting to be where I'm at. I wanna marry him but I also want to be alone...

June 30, 2023

My mom constantly and severely abused me and my sister which ended up with me raising my sister and basically being a mother to my own mom too. One night when I was 14 she attempted to OD while my sister and I were home and when the paramedics came she refused to tell them what she took and I went to her room and grabbed them all the prescriptions she had and told them what drugs she did recreationally on top of that. She didn’t die and the abuse only got worse for years after that, leading to her kicking me out while I was in highschool because I constantly argued with her to protect my sister. She was letting random men move in with us all the time, starving us, etc. and it wasn’t safe for my sister. I regret helping those paramedics.

June 30, 2023

Ok I don’t really know how to say this without sounding like a total bitch and a pick me but I’m not faking it. I’m literally heartless and all of the horrible things that’s ever happened to me doesn’t even affect me I just act like it does and I don’t even know what love feels like Bc I don’t love people and it’s weird and there’s this dude who was In love with me and I had thought I loved him but I didn’t and I realized I didn’t but I didn’t wanna leave him Bc he could ruin my whole reputation so I stayed and told everyone I loved him and I acted all sad and hurt when he “left” me and now everyone feels sorry for me and when I try to tell him I never really did love him he doesn’t believe me and I once played someone Bc they played my friend and I talked to him for atleast 3 weeks and he fell heavily in love with me and I played him Like it was nothing and I felt no emotion or empathy and I feel bad but I also don’t because for some reason I just don’t care. I don’t know what to do with my life anymore.

June 30, 2023

1. I regret cheating on my ex. It was rough being together cuz we were long-distance, but he loved me unconditionally and would’ve done anything for me, and i knew that. He even bought me a hoodie for christmas. but we got into one petty argument and I left him for someone else that i knew wasn’t good for me. i’ll never forgive myself for it and ik i’ll get a lot of hate in the comments from talking about this one but i don’t even care because i deserve the hate. i was immature, selfish, and a bad girlfriend all around. he deserved so much better than me and he still does. i love him with all my heart and i wish i had been a better gf to him. i hope he’s happy now with someone else because he deserves someone better than i am that’ll appreciate all the love i was too cowardly to accept. 2. i regret pushing away my best friend of 4 years . he was always there for me whenever i needed him, and we shared so many good memories. but i always ignored his needs. i never asked him how he was or how he was feeling and i always thought about myself. i never meant to be a bad friend to him. my mental health was shitty especially when the beginning of quarantine started, and i began using him as an emotional tampon, and ig he got tired of me and left me. i don’t blame him. i should’ve found better ways to cope instead of dumping all my problems onto the only friend i had, the only friend that was willing to stay. i didn’t deserve him either. i regret not taking the time to tell him how much i appreciated him. so yeah ig i suck and i hate myself cuz all i do is hurt ppl and im an L gf L friend L daughter L person and i should just ☠️ so no one has to deal with me ok byeeeee

June 30, 2023

:)

June 30, 2023

I used to think a man was watching me everywhere I went. I live out in the woods and I’d have an irrational fear of his eyes watching me through my window at night. I lived like that for 2 years and sometimes things would happen. Our property was in the middle of nowhere but someone stole a chainsaw from our shed and I couldn’t sleep for 4 days. Another time my mom joked about thinking she heard someone ring the doorbell twice at night. She had no idea hearing that triggered me even worse. Another time I found a ballon hanging from a tree and I was certain it was a “sign” cuz I asked how else it got there. I slowly lost my mind and brought out a knife and tried asking the man I thought was watching me to kill me one night out in the woods. I was 12 and it was hard. We moved and I feel better but how do I get rid of the irrational fears like this I get??

June 30, 2023