HSR Stories

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July 30, 2023
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I held onto a lot of my mistakes because I never felt like I deserved to forget any of them. It felt guilty to move on with life when there were friends I let down and never got the chance to apologize. Sometimes, I'd see them around and I would hide. Even with a mask on, I can remember all of them clearly and I get scared to be noticed by them. It's not that I don't want to apologize, but I feel as though I'd be bothering them if they recognized me. It was only recently when I started to free myself from the shackles I put on me. I know I'm no longer the person I used to be, and I think I should live and make the people around me feel loved. But to those that used to be close with me, I never forgot you. Not for a day. Seeing small tidbits of your life through mutual friends made me happy and relieved that you are living. There's only a small chance one of you will read this- Thank you for being a part of my life.

October 12, 2022

I was adopted the day I was born. My biological mother couldn’t take care of me. When I was around 5 or 6 my grandfather and my brother started r@ping and SA me. I finally told someone a bit ago but only my mom believed me. Idk my bio dad but I wish I could live with him. There’s more to the story but all I want is my bio mom to believe me. My sisters started saying mean things to me and I was diagnosed with PTSD, Dysthymia, and more illnesses. I just want to go back in time and wish I said something years ago. I hate myself for tasting something though at the same time. I just wish I was normal. Yk? :(

October 11, 2022

I’ve told only 4 friends this but I wanted to get some advise when I was really young (I don’t remember the exact age it started) my step brother would rape me/ SA me at the time I didn’t know cause I was very young it happened for years and I just let it happen I never told anyone or made it obvious because I knew if I did they weren’t gonna believe me he would come into my room every night for years and he would make me do things with him even during the day every chance he’d get to put his hands on me and he is not the first person to SA me I was also touched by 2 other people but he lasted the longest as I grew older he stopped but over time I realized what he did was wrong I’m now 14 and I get flashbacks often but I blame myself for not saying anything or saying no he is 22 now and doesn’t live with me anymore but sometimes he comes over and all I think about is the things he did to me he talks to me normally as if nothing ever happened but I can’t stand to see or look at him in the eyes it makes me feel sick and disgusting he would tell me how pretty I was I often cry at night thinking how it’s my fault I always think how different it would be if I just said something but there’s nothing I can do now so I just stay full of regret for not speaking up about it

October 11, 2022

I was not happy all the time. I cried in the bathroom and on the bed when you all were there. Everyone expects so much from me but yells at me for everything. I couldn't speak to you about anything. Attempted suicide many times but none saw that but rather saw my mistakes. If I d*e before my time just know I held on for as long as I could.

October 11, 2022

When I was around 13 or 14 I told my little sister about po*n and stuff and showed her a bunch of stuff I shouldn’t have told her I don’t honestly know why I told her about it and I regret it so much and I try to ignore it but it eats at my mind when I was younger around 7 or 8 my grandpa touched me and my cousin had showed me things I showed my little sister not that that’s a excuse to what I did as it was really wrong and I know I should have done it but now me her ignore it ever happened and we are really close but I still can’t forgive myself for telling her that

October 11, 2022

So I’m from a split home. Been that way from 3rd grade and I’m a sophomore in high school now. I’ve seen some rough stuff and I’ve always had to brush it off to be strong for my now 9 year old brother. The one who made it all so horrible is my Dad. Since day one of the divorce he has done everything in his power to make us miserable but not take claim to any of it. It had gotten so bad I’ve pulled my hair out and he still won’t admit anything. There’s been points where I considered confronting him but my fear of what he may do to me or my brother stops me and it hurts so much. I want him to know but I don’t know how. I’m sick of doing this.

October 11, 2022

I’m happy my mom died. I miss her. I miss her everyday. But she was a bipolar drug addict. I was the only person she lived with. She withheld me from my family, took me away from my dad, abandoned her other son and eventually abandoned me when I found her. She left me scared, alone, and I found out everything she told me about my family was a lie. I should hate her, I think I do. But not a day goes by that I don’t miss her all the same. I’m happy she died. Because if she didn’t, I never would have been free.

October 11, 2022

in the summer of 7th grade i was really depressed with myself and life in general. about two months beforehand i was raped by my ex boyfriend and nobody believed me because ive cut myself in the past, and my sister and my friends thought i just wanted attention. things got even worse for me when my mom cheated on my dad. i knew that my dad was not taking it well when his screaming woke me up in the middle of the night. the bathroom door was locked and all i remember thinking was “he’s really going to kill himself.” after all that me and him had a better relationship because i grew to really hate my mom because of the way she was and how she hurt people. my dad hasn’t been the same since. so, i started cutting myself again. legs, arms, stomach, basically anywhere i could cover up. a few days later me and my parents got into an argument about my grades being so low and so my dad got out the belt and started whooping me. after he did this i felt really, i mean REALLY suicidal, and i got out the knife from underneath my bed and started cutting my scabs again. my dad and my mom walked in on me and my dad pulls out his belt again and just starts hitting me wherever he could. he took both his hands and cuffed them in my hair and started pulling it and screaming at me. my mom had to pull him off me to stop. they sent me to a mental institution and told my whole family. nobody looks at me the same anymore. it’s been a few years and i have nobody to talk to. i want to start cutting again because i don’t see a point to life anymore.

October 10, 2022

I was molested at a young age by my cousin. Age maybe 5 (maybe younger) until I was 7. I wouldn't want to go but my mom would take me anyways. And somehow my cousin would always get me alone. I only remember 2 times. Fast forward to when I was 13. I spent the night with my grandmother there because me and my grandmother were close and I helped take care of her. I seen my cousin and I asked him about it. He told me he had touched me more then 2 times. He said it was maybe 6 or 7 times he did it and that if I ever wanted to have sęx I should do it with him. I was disgusted. The fact that he has no idea what mental state that it put me in through all these years and he never apologized. Even till this day. I seen him a few weeks ago at his moms funeral. I just keep the space. He has daughters now. I wonder if he feels sorry. I told my mom when I was 14. She told me I wouldn't have to see him again if I didn't want to. But she passed when I was 19. My life has been hard. I'm 25 now. I still get flashbacks of him holding me down.

October 10, 2022

When I was 5 years old and my older sister was 10, Every day after school I would find her on top of me and I wouldn’t have my underwear. She would either and she will keep going until she gets her orgasm. I don’t remember how long it went for but till this day I act like I didn’t know anything or remember and I’ve never confronted her. Also when I was 15, me and her shared a room and we had our beds together cuz how small it was and she would bring different dudes and have sex with them while I’m next to them.

October 10, 2022