One day I was just napping and it was after school (I do it a lot) but I just try avoiding it on my dad’s day off because he hates it. That day he was supposed to be working but he came home early, around 4pm, so I’ve been sleeping for like an hour. And he punched me to wake up. Ofc I startled but I couldn’t say anything, I was a coward. He told me to get up and clean, even tho I cleaned everything before I slept, but ofc I didn’t argue with him. So I stayed in bed for a couple more seconds just to calm my heart down and when I got off to go to the br and wash up, he was in the kitchen and looked straight into my eyes and said, “look at yourself, go look in the mirror”. I was confused, I thought something was on my face or something, but then he looked up and down at my body and in that moment, I knew. I wasn’t so fat but a little on the chubby side, I was trying to lose weight tho, I was on a diet. So I just stared at him, while my heart shattered. I was so crushed. It was always my mom with those words and now it was him. He continued on and said “who’s gonna want u(as in a guy), u look like a cow”. I couldn’t say anything. I walked away and that’s what started my ed and that’s why I have it to this day. Food is disgusting to me. I thought if I got skinnier that he wouldn’t see me like that anymore. But I was wrong. When he saw me get too skinny, he joked and took food and tried to shove in my mouth. My family was laughing but in that exact moment I wanted to just die. Anyways I just wanted to share, I hope everyone is having a wonderful day.
