I grew up in a good household. But everyday is a struggle for me because I deal with depression and even though my mother is kind she thinks I’m lying, and I’m just lazy but in reality I’m depressed I hate my life. I’m 4’10.5 and I have diabetes, and I have rare disorder called LRBA deficiency, and I’m skinny too. I hate my life I don’t even look good, life don’t hit the same anymore. I really don’t care if I’m going to die I don’t have no one, I’m alone I don’t have no one who loves me or cares about me, Yes my mother loves me but I am a middle child most middle child are left out, but when we get stuff we get excited. I wanna be rich that is my only dream. I want to work and do real estate but I have no money I can’t work because I’m short and I also get clowned because people don’t take me serious they think I’m kidding when I say I’m 17 or when I say I want to work . That’s why I just hate myself I don’t know if god is helping me or torturing me I just hate life rn thanks for letting me get this off my chest

TW// self harm & suicide i’m known as the “perfect girl” with a “perfect life” by everyone. my parents are still together. there are literally no problems in my family, everyone gets along really well. we aren’t struggling with money. i have all A’s. i was accepted into one of the top private schools in my state. i’ve been on homecoming court and i’ve been elected for a position in the student council. my parents do everything they can to give me an amazing life. but for some reason i feel so sad. i don’t know why and i feel so selfish but i feel sad. i feel like everyone hates me and like they would be better off without me. everyone thinks i’m perfect and my friends even tell me that i’m “the only mentally stable person” that they know. i’m scared of telling anyone else this after it got out and got to my parents. but since this is anonymous i wanted to let it out. i self harm and i relapsed so many times. i attempted 3 times in the past 2 years. obviously it didn’t work and i don’t plan on doing it again for now but i have thoughts about it. it sucks. and i feel so hopeless and helpless even more since no one can see it. i know this is selfish but sometimes i wish people would try and understand and talk to me

• August 5, 2023