i had a budgie, her name was hope. she was the sweetest bird ever, everyone loved her and she loved everyone. a very sweet and gentle bird. she was learning to fly too, i always called her my little chick because she was yellow with beautiful red eyes. one day it was already nighttime and Hope was cold and she didn’t want to wake up the other birds by getting close to them cause budgies are chaotic. so i grabbed her and put her in my blanket so she can be warm. i was watching tiktok and i forgot she was there due to my short term memory loss. i suffocated her, crushed her and broke her neck. the next day i didn’t see her in the cage and i remembered what happened, i immediately started throwing blankets around to try to find her, hoping she’d fly out but the opposite happened, she fell to the floor, dead. i turned off my light so the birds didn’t see her lifeless body, i picked her up and started to cry. my mom blamed me for what happened and it is my fault but i didn’t mean to. i was forced to go to school even though hope was dead and i didn’t want to go. i made my cousin bury her for me and i went to school and broke down crying a few dozen times. when i got home, i saw some flowers and without my mom looking, i grabbed some and took it to Hope’s grave. i still regret it and lately i’ve been having dreams of hope being able to fly and it hurts because she was growing her wings getting ready to fly and she had a boyfriend which was my other male bird. maybe these dreams are because i don’t want to let go or accept what happened. i regret that decision more than anything. i blame myself for what happened and i live with the guilt that eats me whenever i look back at that day. sometimes i’m scared to sleep because of what happened. rest in peace Hope, i hope she knows i didn’t mean to cut her life short :(.